Proust Questionnaire!

7

The other day I wrote up this little post for Limebird Writers all about using a questionnaire to interview characters for a screen play or a novel. After I wrote this up (and as a few people mentioned in the comments to that post) I realized I’d have a much easier time answering these questions about a character than I would about myself.

So I thought what the heck, I’d give it a go and be like Marcel Proust for the day, and answer these questions about myself.

Marcel Proust Questionnaire

What is your favorite virtue?

My favorite virtue in others is the ability to help people. That’s why I love Ellen DeGeneres so much, she has the means to get people who truly deserve a little help and inspires everyone to be kind to one another.

What are your favorite qualities in a man?

Not acting like a man. Ok.. that sounds wrong. Let me think of my husband for a minute, he loves kitty cats will, help cook dinner, do laundry and other things like that around the house. He also kills the bugs for me. We can sit around talking about books and movies and fictional characters and have a good laugh. I don’t know what qualities those are – not being a big hot head jerk. Does that count?

What are your favorite qualities in a woman?

OK I hope I don’t get flack for this – but a woman who can be a woman without whining to the world that she’s empowered to things just because she’s a woman. I know I am a woman, but I really can’t stand those over the top insane women’s liberation folks.

What is your chief characteristic?

Fun – happy – carefree.

What do you appreciate the most in your friends?

My best friend and I are almost complete opposites, when I think about it. She’s tall and skinny, I’m short and fat. She loves nature, I hate nature. She never cries, I cry at sappy McDonald’s commercials… the list could go on and on. But I appreciate that even though she hates every other human on Earth, she doesn’t judge me, she would never look down on me, she would be there in a second for me – even if it was 4 in the morning. She would drop anything for me, and I’d drop anything for her.

What is your main fault?

I’m lazy. I procrastinate.

What is your favorite occupation?

Well none that I’ve had!  The occupation I want is a film editor – more precisely a trailer editor.

What is your idea of happiness?

Well, I’m partly there already – I have my husband, my sidekick. So I feel like even with things suck really bad (and they kind of do right now) that with him around it will be OK. But to add to that, I’d like to have my degree and a real career, I think maybe with the degree at least I’d feel a little more complete.

What is your idea of misery?

Being strung out on drugs and going on welfare and not having enough money for anything. Let’s just say I’ve seen that first  hand and don’t want that for my life or my children (whenever I have them…)

If not yourself, who would you be?

Well.. that’s an odd question now isn’t it? I suppose I’d like to be a better version of myself.  Does that count? I like being me for the most part, but I sure would like to have more money and a better job and a better house, so if I could be me but with those things, I think I’d be good!

Where would you like to live?

Stars Hollow, Connecticut.

What is your favorite color and flower?

Orange, and Mums.

What is your favorite bird?

Blackbird singing in the dead of night… I don’t know really, I never thought about it too much.

Who are your favorite prose authors?

Stephen King and J.K. Rowling.

Who are your favorite poets?

Dr. Seuss.

Who are your favorite heroes in fiction?

Neville Longbottom!

Who are your favorite heroines in fiction?

Wonder Woman!

Who are your favorite painters and composers?

Painter – Goya.

Composer – Bach.. and Matthew Bellamy.

Who are your heroes in real life?

Spider-man! Oh wait, real life. My granpa, Daddaddy.

Who are your favorite heroines in real life?

Ellen DeGeneres

What characters in history do you most dislike?

Hitler. Satan.

Who are your heroes in world history?

Mother Theresa. Jesus.

What is your favorite food and drink?

Chicken Tikka Massala. Hot drink: Chai tea latte with a shot of espresso. Cold drink: Vanilla Coke or  sweet tea. Alcoholic: long island iced tea or pineapple upside down cake.

What are your favorite names?

Vladimir. No really, I don’t know, that’s an odd question. I like my granny’s name – Lorna.  We have decided if we ever breed to name the kid Dominic if it’s a boy.

What do you hate the most?

Wow… the one thing I hate the most out of all other things? When I wake up 10 minutes before the alarm goes off. There goes 10 minutes I could have been sleeping!

Seriously though, I’m not a fan of intolerance.

What military event do you admire the most?

When the south lost.

Which reform do you admire the most?

I can’t think of any I admire.

What natural talent would you like to be gifted with?

I always wish I could draw.

How do you wish to die?

Old and in my sleep.

What is your present state of mind?

Well, I’m disappointed that I didn’t win that Mega Millions! I’m sleepy for some reason. I guess my present state of mind is run of the mill.

What fault have you tolerated the most?

Stealing and lying. I never learn my lesson.

What is your motto?

Well I never really thought of this before but I suppose it would be to be as happy as you can, come what may, and let things roll off your back. Life is too short to spend it grumpy and miserable.

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Lucky 7!

3

What a lovely surprise I had waiting for me today when I logged online! The super wonderful awesome amazing great fantastic Kourtney Heintz tagged me in the writer’s blogging game – The Lucky 7 Meme!

The rules:

  • Go to page 77 of your current MSS/WIP
  • Go to line 7
  • Copy down the next 7 lines, sentences, or paragraphs, and post them as they’re written
  • Tag 7 other authors

Ok… I’ve never shared this with anyone, ever. So, it kind of freaks me out posting it here, honestly. Anyway, this is a rough-rough draft. A pre-shitty rough draft. The roughest draft of all possible rough drafts. It’s a children’s book I’ve been working on. I honestly don’t even have a title for it!

At any rate, David is the main character, and he has two friends – Franny who is carefree, and Matthew who is extremely paranoid. David’s dad is a really evil wizard, and they live in the castle with the King. I guess I should mention it’s a fantasy … ahem anyway here goes:

“Is your dad…” Franny trailed off as they arrived at the sea. “Watching us?”

“Of course he is!” Matthew exclaimed. “He put a hex on David that lets him see through his eyes. It’s a powerful Wizard curse, they do it to people all the time.” Matthew ran ahead of the other two and jumped in the water making a large splash.

“Is that true?” Franny whispered to David, wondering if Aeron could see her questioning him.

“No!” David screwed up his face, “Of course not! Don’t you think I’d notice if I had a hex put on me?” David tried to brush off what Matthew had just said, but was finding it hard to shake the feeling that he was being watched.

 

I liked the method of tagging I used a few weeks ago — if you are a writer and want a fun way to share 7 lines of your work in progress…  like or comment and consider yourself tagged!

YEAH!

DO

IT

NOW!

Ahem, sorry I got a tad overzealous there, I’m better now.

Stop and Look Up

14

I noticed my last two posts were a bit on the grumpy side. I blame the heat! It has been in the mid-80’s all week and I am MELTING (I can’t make the word “melting” any stronger!) I work at home at a call center, and that means that my area has to be quiet. Since I live with two insane cats who do nothing but make my life hard, and a crazy man who yells at video games all day, I have to leave the door shut. This closes me off from… roughly all cool air. Add three computer’s to the mix and you’ve got one super toasty me. No joke, I had a chocolate chip cookie in here from yesterday that I didn’t eat, I went to pick it up today and the chips had melted!

The AC is on, it’s just trying to destroy me. I really really REALLY dread summer!

ANYWAY, I got off on another rant that I didn’t mean to. I noticed that I had been grumpy for a few days and when I get grumpy I like to look to the sky. It makes me feel like no matter what is going on in my head or in my life that in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t really matter. I don’t know if that is a good feeling or a bad feeling, now that I think about it.

I saw the evening sky the other day and it really struck me.

This was just before the sun set. I love how near the horizon the sky is light and clouds are dark, but then the sky transitions to a deeper blue and lighter clouds.

I love when I can look up at the sky and see something beautiful like this. Thinking of the world, the solar system, the universe… it all makes my silly problems seem not so bad. Maybe instead of stopping to smell the roses, we should all stop and just look up.

Just an Annoying Rant

4

I just don’t understand people.

I start to feel beaten in my job. I work customer service and for the most part the only people I actually talk to are the ones demanding a supervisor, or making outlandish legal threats. I’m not the type of person that can handle things like this.

Why have I been able to work in my position for 3 years now? I have no idea. I deal with cranky, crabby, down right horrible people.

My job itself is fine, I’m glad to have a job. I work from the comfort (use that term lightly, it’s freaking hot in my office these days since we hit summer about a month ago) of my own home. And most of the time, I can deal with the crabbiness. God knows why, but I’m about as perky and upbeat as they come.

But then, I get one so downright horrible that it just drains me. It’s hard to bounce back from. It sticks with me. I know they aren’t mad at me per se, but there’s nothing I can do to fix the company’s issue that has caused such anger, and I’m stuck listening to someone degrade me for an hour until my soul is just tired. I had one of those calls tonight. The man wasn’t even that mean, he was just refusing to accept anything I said, and even yelled at me for wishing him a good night.

It’s calls like that that I feel like I need a support group for. Let’s go around the room and talk about the horrifying customer’s we’ve had to deal with until we all feel like our souls are doing better. Does that exist?

I just wish people didn’t assume they know how things work. And trust me when I say there isn’t a magic button I can press to make the internet work right. If there was, I would have pressed it 2 minutes into the soul butchering conversation and spared my sanity from the hour long beat down. I really would have.

This was just an annoying rant, I’m sorry.

Get Off My Lawn!

8

I love going out with my husband – to dinner, to the coffee shop, to the movies, even to the grocery store. I don’t really care what it is we are doing, I always enjoy it.

Until the teenagers show up. Now now, I know, a lot of teenagers are OK. And sure I’m not that old, and was once a teenager myself so I have to understand where they are coming from, right? No, no. I do not understand or empathize with these miscreants.

It was a very pleasant night out tonight, around 70 degrees or so. We sat outside our favorite coffee shop, pleasantly minding our own business when these two boys decide to ruin the collective IQ around them just by existing. One of them exclaimed something like “I wouldn’t be smoking if I had some chaw”. (Chaw is chewing tobacco, yum…) Yeah you’re real cool smoking and chewing, the ladies must just eat you up!

Fine, whatever, smoke your cigarettes so the girls will swoon over you. But then they sat at one of the metal tables with the holes in it… you know like this:

This boy proceeded to smoke (like a champ) and spit non stop THROUGH the holes in the table. It was literally every second, smoke, spit, smoke, spit, speak, spit, spit, spit, smoke, spit, speak, spit. Spit. Spit. Spit. It was disgusting.

He tried to impress the girls behind him by talking about how some particular girl that I assume they all knew tried to “f*** him”, and then he smoked and spat some more. Thankfully the girls had enough intelligence not to fall for the idiot.

I wanted to stalk the boy until his mommy picked him up just so I could yell at her for letting him out into society, dumbing down the world around him one breath at a time.

I’m starting to feel old. GET OFF MY DAMN LAWN!

Satanic Forces Are At Work Here

3

Maybe I’ve been watching too much Supernatural lately…

I take that back, I know I’ve been watching too much Supernatural…but I just can’t stay away!

Woo and I were out on our porch yesterday afternoon and I looked up to see this demon staring straight into my soul from the apartment across the street. I mean, it was literally eating away at my soul trying to devour all that was good so it could lead me into the dark-side!

So I did what any rational 28 year old woman would do…I hid behind my husband yelling, “Is it gone yet?”

Of course it wasn’t gone.

Well, since it wasn’t leaving I knew I had to get a picture of it, to see if its eyes were glowing of course! From across the street my phone camera was doing a pretty poor job of capturing the demon, though.

That left me with only one other option – record it with the video camera.

Please excuse my squealing… I was dealing with a demon here though, I think I’m allowed to squeal, right?

It didn’t move while I was recording it, but several times yesterday I saw the demon’s head move, scanning the street for more souls to devour.

Doing something completely out of my element today, I worked up the courage to march across the street and get a closer look at this demon who had moved into my neighborhood to feast on the souls of the innocent.

Turns out it’s nothing but a freaking Garfield window cling.

Innocent? I think not!

I have this demon’s number. It’s just disguised as an innocent cute Garfield plush to lure the children into its lair!

It won’t get me!

Louie Louie

3

I forgot what my husband’s name was yesterday. My dad asked me how David was doing, and my reply was, “Who’s David?”

Well…ya-see I call him Woo, his last name. “Wait, isn’t that your last name too?” Why yes, yes it is. But for the 5 years we dated before we got married, it wasn’t my last name.

I was introduced to this weird guy named Woo way back in the day and for months I just thought that was his first name. By the time I realized it was his last name, well it was just too late wasn’t it? He was Woo to me.

Then I got to thinking, there are a lot of nicknames in my family. Most of my family call me Louie. The “Louie” nickname comes in many forms – Lou, Lou-Bell, Lou-Jack, Louie… That’s why most of my online names have the word Lou in it somewhere. I know one thing, it’d be awful strange to hear mom or my sisters call me Laura.

I have an aunt I call Rascal (yes, proper noun for her!) Her name is Anne, and according to legend she used to call me a little rascal, so I’d just flip it back on her and call her Rascal right back! I don’t remember this back and forth, that must have been before my brain cooled. And I honestly don’t even know at what point in my life I realized Anne was her name, not Rascal. It doesn’t matter, to me she will always and forever be Rascal.

It’s funny how these nicknames form and stick. It doesn’t matter how old I get, I’ll always be Louie or Lou to many near and dear family members. My husband will always be Woo to me, even though my last name is Woo too… it doesn’t matter. Oh, and you better believe people sure love to call me Lou Woo!

What’s strange though, is I always feel awkward signing my name “Louie” on gifts or cards. If I give a Christmas gift to my sister I feel I should sign it Louie because that’s more my name to her than Laura is. For some reason I don’t feel I have the right to call myself Louie though.

Does anyone else have fun nicknames?