What the World Wants to Know – July

14

You guessed it! Time to see what weird google searches brought visitors to my blog in the last 30 days.  Without further ado (I copied and pasted these as is):

  • my granny pantyhose blog – Um?? I don’t even want to know.
  • shut up brain it’s sleep time – You’ve got a point there! It is sleep time dammit!
  • husband says our neighborhood looks like the ghetto – Maybe you should move then. Oh, wait…it’s my neighborhood that is the ghetto. Maybe I should move then. Nah that’s too much effort.
  • grammas in pantyhose –  Really? Why? This is disturbing, and I know I shoot myself in the foot by even putting this in a post…but when have I ever written about “grammas” and “pantyhose” together? There was this one time…oh wait, no, that never happened…
  • i’m married and i’m obsessed with tom hiddleston – Me too girlfriend, me too.

  • “my husband’s belly button” – my husband has a pretty amusing belly button, now that I think about it. I like to button attack him when he least suspects it. Mwahahaha. Oh crap, he reads this.
  • harry potter fat kid – Bitch I know you’re talkin’ bout Neville and you can just back on up off that “fat” comment, he is svelte and amazing and we don’t go ’round talkin’ bout Neville like that!…..Ahem whoah sorry about that, I seemed to have gone a little crazy.
  • “90s bangs” – Please, no. Don’t do it. Nothing good will come of it. Put the scissors down and slowly back away.
  • limebirds – Yeah, Limebirds! Now that was worthy a google search!
  • tom hiddleston loves cheese cakes – Well who the heck doesn’t?

There you have it folks, the things that keep the world up at night. They’re definitely keeping me up at night now…

 

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What the World Wants to Know

11

Sometimes I find strange search engine terms that have led people to my blog. My husband found it amusing that he wrote one blog post about Katherine Heigel in her bra, and now gets traffic daily from people searching that out.  So now he includes a picture of her in a bra with every post. Seriously, world? This is what motivates people … Katherine Heigel in a bra.

Anyway, here are some of the more interesting things that people have done a google search on leading them to my blog (I’m copying and pasting these just as they are, I’m not correcting spelling or grammar):

limebirds band: Well, I am a part of the Limebird Writers, but I didn’t know we had a band! Can I join in on tambourine?

paintings of man sex: Oh yeah, paintings of man sex, I know how that led someone to my blog….wait, what? Paintings of man sex? No I don’t think I’ve ever written about or included paintings of man sex. Do you think now that I’ve said “Paintings of man sex”  5 times it will lead more people here? I hope they aren’t disappointed when they find 0 paintings of man sex. (Disturbingly enough, this brought 2 people to my blog…)

pitchers of supernatural: Well I wasn’t aware that one could drink the Winchester brothers (must….get….mind….out … of … gutter… nope too late!)… but I have posted pictures of Supernatural. Here’s one now!

cheap ways to cover walls: Been throwing one too many head through a wall and need to cover up the crime? Sorry to say I cannot help in that department.

sidegoggled: Now this I’m actually pleased to see. It confirms that I in fact did not make up the word side goggled. Take that husband! Neener needer boo boo!

how would i look like gails mother from hunger games: I don’t know how you would look like Gale’s mother, maybe because that is the way you were born? This question is giving me brain damage.

fat kid from harry potter: Well that’s just hurtful! How would you like it if I called you “skinny kid from the internet”? Yeah… doesn’t really have a sting to it, does it? Moving on.

cheesecake congress: Do we vote for cheesecakes to be in congress? Or is there a congress composed of only cheesecakes? I’m intrigued by this idea of cheesecake congress. More importantly, I really want some cheesecake now.

cheesecake deprivation: That is a sad SAD thought, to be sitting alone deprived of cheesecake. That should be illegal.

what is the first book in the uglies series: Uglies

“pantyhose” husband: Again, why did this search term lead someone to my blog? My husband doesn’t wear pantyhose, that I know of. (Well…there was this one Halloween…) If he did happen to wear pantyhose, I certainly wouldn’t blog about it for the world to see.

what is neville’s real name in real life?: IMDb.com is a great website.

last name woo: It’s a pretty fun last name to have, if I do say so myself. It really confuses people when they see me since I’m a super fair-skinned, light-haired and  blue-eyed woman, and they learn my last name. No, no one has asked me if I was Chinese on the phone (a receptionist asked me if I ever got that question). Oddly enough, my husband who is part Chinese doesn’t look a bit Chinese at all, but no one seems to question why his last name is Woo…

dax shepard sam rockwell: Oh, I hope my husband doesn’t see this.

“two lindsay lohans”: Dear God, no! Oh wait you probably mean The Parent Trap, don’t you?

are you a man or a muppet: I’m a muppet of a man.

that awkward moment when dean winchester: bursts into my room naked. Oh wait, no my head was still in the gutter from earlier, sorry about that.

These are the things that keep people up at night. Now, these are the things that keep me up at night.